Few masked faces on top of me.. shaking my body and asking to "wake up ! Mr. Kar your surgery is over !!"
Its one of the strangest experiences to get out of the deep slumber caused by anesthetics. The entire body trembles, chill runs through each part ! I can see nurses dumping couple of blankets on me.
I am desperately trying to say something, but voice is not coming out clearly. Tons of masked faces looking at me.. while the chill subsides finally. And brain comes to a state where I can notice my state of being.
First thing, I notice, not a single part is free. All parts are connected to something. I am out of the OT and in Intensive Care Unit. There is a catheter, there is IV line, there are oozing tubes from neck, ECG and other monitoring wires connected to chest.
I could mumble doctors talking, how the surgery went super smooth and the facial symmetry is 98% back. I tried to feel my face, and could only a half of it.
Surprisingly, I could move my tongue a bit, trying to swallow something and make a bit of noise, but realized there is a tube through my throat, through my nose, which will be used for feeding me as the mouth has been worked up on. Damn ! Even that is not free ?
There was absolute Zero degree of freedom. Wait !! Not yet.. a doctor walks in with a syringe and a fishing pin and thread, asks me to open my mouth. I did !
He gives a small injection on my tongue tip to numb it (here is a point where you do not know what hurts more), puts a stitch on the tongue and leaves a 6 cm long loose thread outside of mouth, calmly explaining "During this phase of post - op, there is a chance of tongue reversing, when the patient is groggy. We would not like that !" Fantastic - make sure a thread is stitched to tongue and falling outside the mouth for some one to keep pulling !!
Now, that is the Zero degree of freedom. Nothing moves ! Wanted to raise my hand to signal someone, and realized left hand is immobilized with a cast, to protect the wrist where the flap is taken from.
Zero degree of freedom until I figured, I can talk, greet, ask using just my eyes. I sprang back to my positive self, and greeted each one around the table in ICU with "How are you ? " Smile plus the eyes. I am amongst people now. I like it that way.
Doctors gave a run down of events and high lights of the surgery.
- No blood was needed (even through it was organized and kept), because my Himoglobin was quite good.
- 4 teeth from upper left jaw are gone during the surgery. Nothing that impacts my smile :)
- I was constantly talking during the surgery (what did I say ? ::)
- 45 lymph nodes have been removed as a safety measure. All of them sent for further Biopsy.
The new flap inside my mouth feels like my own dead skin in my mouth. Horrible taste. Doc starts bottle of dextrose through the IV line, to make sure the foreign flap, that has been precision stitched to cheek blood vessels, wall to wall, stays well hydrated for 48 hrs so that it is accepted by my mouth.
I finally see my brother and my wife coming in to ICU. Felt really good. I smiled through eyes. They assured me that my face is ok, by taking a pic in phone and showing it back to me.
Surgery is done, now starts the recovery. A long, painful process. I find my mind surprisingly fresh and positive and ready to go through.
The body was mostly in agreement, but how would I know ??
Its one of the strangest experiences to get out of the deep slumber caused by anesthetics. The entire body trembles, chill runs through each part ! I can see nurses dumping couple of blankets on me.
I am desperately trying to say something, but voice is not coming out clearly. Tons of masked faces looking at me.. while the chill subsides finally. And brain comes to a state where I can notice my state of being.
First thing, I notice, not a single part is free. All parts are connected to something. I am out of the OT and in Intensive Care Unit. There is a catheter, there is IV line, there are oozing tubes from neck, ECG and other monitoring wires connected to chest.
I could mumble doctors talking, how the surgery went super smooth and the facial symmetry is 98% back. I tried to feel my face, and could only a half of it.
Surprisingly, I could move my tongue a bit, trying to swallow something and make a bit of noise, but realized there is a tube through my throat, through my nose, which will be used for feeding me as the mouth has been worked up on. Damn ! Even that is not free ?
There was absolute Zero degree of freedom. Wait !! Not yet.. a doctor walks in with a syringe and a fishing pin and thread, asks me to open my mouth. I did !
He gives a small injection on my tongue tip to numb it (here is a point where you do not know what hurts more), puts a stitch on the tongue and leaves a 6 cm long loose thread outside of mouth, calmly explaining "During this phase of post - op, there is a chance of tongue reversing, when the patient is groggy. We would not like that !" Fantastic - make sure a thread is stitched to tongue and falling outside the mouth for some one to keep pulling !!
Now, that is the Zero degree of freedom. Nothing moves ! Wanted to raise my hand to signal someone, and realized left hand is immobilized with a cast, to protect the wrist where the flap is taken from.
Zero degree of freedom until I figured, I can talk, greet, ask using just my eyes. I sprang back to my positive self, and greeted each one around the table in ICU with "How are you ? " Smile plus the eyes. I am amongst people now. I like it that way.
Doctors gave a run down of events and high lights of the surgery.
- No blood was needed (even through it was organized and kept), because my Himoglobin was quite good.
- 4 teeth from upper left jaw are gone during the surgery. Nothing that impacts my smile :)
- I was constantly talking during the surgery (what did I say ? ::)
- 45 lymph nodes have been removed as a safety measure. All of them sent for further Biopsy.
The new flap inside my mouth feels like my own dead skin in my mouth. Horrible taste. Doc starts bottle of dextrose through the IV line, to make sure the foreign flap, that has been precision stitched to cheek blood vessels, wall to wall, stays well hydrated for 48 hrs so that it is accepted by my mouth.
I finally see my brother and my wife coming in to ICU. Felt really good. I smiled through eyes. They assured me that my face is ok, by taking a pic in phone and showing it back to me.
Surgery is done, now starts the recovery. A long, painful process. I find my mind surprisingly fresh and positive and ready to go through.
The body was mostly in agreement, but how would I know ??
No comments:
Post a Comment